Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Eye Candy, Tooth Candy

I've decided it is rational to allot exactly zero time these days to dithering about boys because I don't even know where I'll be living in a few months anyway, and you know, I've got other priorities right now.  (The reader interjects: "That's wonderful, E's brain!  Now if only you had the means to actually enoforce such a *cough* rational decision...")

Speaking of which. I had an almost exciting encounter with my new dentist yesterday.  He was entirely gorgeous and entirely foreign (to this country and my home country, and that's entirely appealing) so of course I was entirely awkward because I'm out of practice dealing with handsome men of my approximate age because of entirely serious abovementioned rational decision and anyway he told me I have TWO cavities and the last time I had anything wrong with my teeth at all and I mean in the slightest was, oh, 15 years ago so of course I tried to explain all this to Dentist Pretty Face of the Eyes the Color of Finely Polished Chinese Jade Resplendent in Sunlight while he was sticking that stupid tiny mirror thing all the way to my back molars but I ended up not speaking full sentences at all and instead mumbling and giggling and when he asked if I had any questions I said "Oh, no, no" and walked away but then immediately walked right back to gaze at his baby-blue be-scrubbed yet dignified aspect one last time and enthusiastically cried "Wait! Do you mean questions about teeth? In general? (I flip hair over shoulder) Uh, in which case, um, (I giggle inanely) uh, ah, no! I mean, no I don't. I mean, ahahahaha! I'm fine..." and then dashed out of that dental practice like a wee lamb escaping from the fence but day-dreamed about him all the way home on the bus and then went online to book my next appointment and of course googled Mr McToothCare once I knew his entire name which was really long and über foreign and found out that he's entirely... married.

So then I laughed at myself, reprimanded my heart and overactive imagination for not heeding my rational brain-parts (when will you learn, E? Those brain-parts win. They win, I say!) and then I ate a bunch of old candies I found in the deep recesses of my cupboard just despite dentists everywhere. I mean, I really rolled that sugar around in my mouth.

And that was it.

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